Not alone?
by ANIMELOVEDOLL
Summary: Edward is all alone now that his brother is married. Does Roy step in to help aid the pain? Rated Mature because it's a mature story. Not sure how many chapters it will be. EdXRoy.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey! This is my new story about my favorite yaoi couple Ed and Roy! I love them and even though their not real -awww- they are my escape at the end of the day! So no flames please and I would really love it if you reviewed at the end of this chapter! Much appreciation. Oh and I'm warning you right now - if you don't like yaoi stay off this page or don't leave a nasty comment! **

**Ed: ;P**

**Roy: :)**

**Me: :D**

I stared down at the food in front of me. It was a battle to make myself sit and down half a roll. A steak, bacon-wrapped asparagus, deviled eggs. Yes, it was an amazing dinner, yet I was still ungrateful and sat there trying to ignore the hunger pains. I sipped at my glass and pushed a few things around on my plate. Weight wasn't an issue - until now. It seemed I had lost all interest to eat. It's not a bad thing, I don't think, but I could eat a little more, I guess. Nobody looked at me, but I had in mind what they most definitely were thinking. The room had an impossibly weird air to it. At last I saw a Pinako stare openly at me. I looked away trying to avoid her uncomfortable gesture. I knew they could see, all of them. It's not hard to spot if Pinako could see my indifference. I looked away from every one too upset to eat and sat there twiddling my thumbs in a nervous manner. It wasn't proper, especially with a man to my superior sitting right next to me. He was staring off in to space talking on and on only to keep an awkward silence from settling on the room. I sawed off a small amount of steak and chewed slowly trying to get her burning eyes off of me.

"Would you excuse me for a moment Colonel Mustang, but I have to talk to Edward in private." She pushed away from the chair and damn it all - if she didn't all, but drag me out of the room like I was three.

"Edward." She stated simply. We where out on the deck and I had the means to jump over the railing. I didn't want to be here. I wanted to go back to Central and sleep, but an unexpected trip had deprived me of that. Colonel Bastard had dragged me out here complaining that I hadn't seen my remaining family in a completely overreacted short time of about two years… Yes, alright, may be it had been a while, but I was just unhappy staying there and having to look at that pitiful house - house site that we had burned down an enormous time ago. It was excruciatingly painful to just stand at the grave of our lost mother and the place where my father had left and had yet to return. It was even more unbearable to think of the place we had tried to resurrect the only person that I had left in the world. Alphonse had happily married to Winry and lived with the old bat that was standing before me at this very moment or more like she lived with them.

"I… Truthfully, I just want to go back to Central. I feel a little uneasy after the train ride and I need to sleep right now." I watched her expression, but nothing changed. The same old granny. She nodded and left me outside to do as I wish. I turned to watch the stars. It seemed like we didn't have any of those in the city. That was about the only thing I missed about this place. It was quiet, secluded, and mostly for the time being, calm. I turned and headed back up the stairs and in to my old bedroom. There were two beds like always and I flopped down on the one that I usually slept in when I was younger. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep, but it just wouldn't come. Damn it! I rolled over and examined my nails. I usually wear a clear coat over my real ones, but I had neglected them lately. I guess it's time to get out the nail polish. I went over to the old desk on the other end of the room and pulled out the bottle I had left there when I was really young . The first time I desperately dashed out of the house to get to the train. The first time I had ever ridden a train. The day I got on with a goal, but now that's all over. It had been a while - more like years and years. I shook it roughly trying to see if it hadn't dried up. I was probably going to have to ask for some from Winry, but the liquid inside glided up and down the surface as I swayed it back and forth. I sighed in relief. At least that was one more embarrassment that I didn't have to worry about. I flopped back down on my bed once again and went to work. I started off with my middle finger. It was a funny thing to do seeing how most people would start at one side and work their way over, but it was just like me to get down to the middle of things. I lay there a moment after I had gotten them finished, but noticed that I was still horribly bored. I sighed and took off my shoes. I started painting my toe nails and was about finished when Roy Mustang made an appearance at my door. I sat there staring at him with the tiny brush in my hand; he stood there starring at me with a blank expression on his face. This was something I thought- no hoped he'd never find out about, but it seems that I'll probably never hear the end of it. He smirked at me and proceeded in to the room. I just lowered my head and went back to my feet.

"What do you want?" I stated calmly. It was one of the nicer things I could've said to him, but I ignored my inward ranting and waited for his response.

"I have to sleep in here tonight. I never thought I'd walk in to see Edward Elric painting his toe nails." He said with a chuckle. I didn't look up at him, just kept on painting away. Then I went back to my right hand once again and gave it a double coat. We sat there in silence for some time. As soon as I was finished I walked over to the desk and simply sat it down on the top.

"If you don't mind me asking, why do you paint your nails if you wear gloves all the time? Painting the nails is supposed to attract attention, is it not?" He said with a wide smirk. I wanted to shoot a choice freshly glossed nail up at him, but thought against it. It was something I also wouldn't hear the end of and I was already tired of his mouth.

"Do you have to stick your nose in to my business constantly or are you just trying to hear yourself talk?" I flopped back down on my bed and looked at the ceiling. There was nothing out of the ordinary about it. It was white and that's basically all there is to know. I turned my head to the side to look at him.

"Do you snore?" I asked quickly. It was late and I didn't want to be kept up all night by an insistent bastard.

"Are you trying to change the subject Fullmetal?" He asked in a teasing way.

"Shut up." I flipped over and pulled up the covers making sure to pull them all the way out from under the mattress. I couldn't sleep with my feet covered. He watched with an eyebrow raised. I gave him a glare in return. He just steadily stared.

"What do you want?" I asked frustrated and groggy. Damn it I just wanted to sleep and here he is acting like a complete bastard!

"What are you doing?" He asked unknowingly.

"I don't like it when my feet are covered up ok? Is that all right with you? How do feel about that?" I went on in a mocking way. He only smirked and stood up to start pulling off his jacket and pants!

"Hold it!" I said looking away. He stopped and looked around.

"What?" He asked dumbfounded.

"Well, don't that in here!" I said taking a peek through my hands.

"Fullmetal, were both men." He stated plainly. I just swallowed and shifted on the bed so I could face the wall.

"All the more reason to hide ourselves from each other. I thought you had a little bit more dignity than that." I spoke nearly in a yell, almost in a rant, but I held back to some point. There was no use in him changing somewhere else now. I mean, he was already half undressed.

"What's your problem… Shorty?" He was due for a good beating! I should punch him in the face calling me… small!

"What are you trying to get at you overly dressed stuffed shirt bastard! I'm not small! I'm not!" I took a deep breath and watched him slip into bed. He was clad in only his boxers. Oh… My… Gosh! I can't believe he would do that! That's a very thin piece of fabric! I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes. Taking deep breaths was the only option at this point. As I did this I felt almost weary. I needed sleep. Having to sit on the train all day with that bastard was anything, but a walk in the park. Do I ever get a break?

"Goodnight… Edward." He yawned and rolled over to face the wall. What the hell had he just addressed me by? My name. He had never said it before except for a few times when he really wanted my attention. I'm surprised he even knew it and here he is casually rambling it off like he did it everyday. That's just bull shit. I stopped to think about it a moment. It was one of the better things he could call me. It's not so bad, but it still feels so informal. I just rolled onto my belly and mutter a soft 'good night' in return. I fell asleep almost instantly or it felt that way.

_I found myself being very young in my dreams. Running around and playing a game with Alphonse. Smiling faces, laughing wildly, and oddly something felt out of place. I turned around to run away from him in a game of tag and was lost when I turned back to find a desert and no sibling. I stopped to take a good look and then something grabbed me by my leg and drug me under. I couldn't breath it felt like I was submerged in water. I tried to suck in air, but I only suffocated on the soft grainy dirt. I was going to die! I kicked at the hand dragging me down and I frantically looked to see who or what it was. It was Alphonse in the armor and he was laughing wildly! What was this? Some kind of sick twisted game? My eyes widened at the sight and I quit struggling only to find he released me and I clawed my way back up coughing as I hit the surface. I lay there and looked up in to the barren sky. I blinked to find I was some place different this time. I was laying in a field of grass. I slowly stood up and turned to find Envy there waiting for me._

"_Hello Edward!" He turned in to Roy and punch a whole through my chest. _

I let out a blood curdling scream and gasp for air only to find myself awake. I reached to my chest and then my face. I was crying like an infant.

"Ed…ward?" Roy sat up from his temporary bed and gave me a groggy look. I flipped the covers back and ran out the door, down the stairs, and on to the front porch. I went along as quietly as I could. Hopefully Colonel would just go back to sleep and leave me alone. I spoke too soon as I heard someone pushing open the screen door and walking across the porch. Tears still ran down my cheeks, but this was just exactly the opposite of what usually happens after a scary dream. I don't cry. I'm a man and men aren't supposed to cry. He sat down beside me and lit up a cigarette.

"You wanna' talk about it?" He said in a hushed tone. He didn't look at me. He didn't laugh and brush it off. He just sat there in his clingy wife-beater and a pair of boxers. I looked down at my knees to discover my flesh one was shaking. I pulled them up against my chest and looked in the other direction wiping my nose and eyes. Hopefully he would get the point that I didn't want to talk and give up, but being the persistent bastard he was, I knew better.

"Yeah." I said anyway. It was good to let things out sometimes. I told myself this in an attempt to calm the manly voice going on and on in my head. Telling me that I was a lousy guy for spilling my feelings all around the place like a distraught woman.

"Go ahead." He said taking a long drag off of his cigarette and blowing it out through his nose.

"Well, it was just a nightmare. It's not that important anyway." I rested the side of my face on my arms and looked up at him. He looked down at me. May be the manly conscience was right. May be it would all work out better if I just kept it in, but his look almost willed me on. I took a deep breath.

"I suffocated and then I was stabbed in the chest." I said plainly. I left all the parts about Alphonse and him out. It was only a nightmare, as I had stated before. There was no need to tell him anyway, it actually wasn't even him - it was Envy and it makes since that I would have dreams about something so traumatic in my life. Alright I was really done now, I didn't want to talk about it anymore. As if on cue my stomach growled. I looked down at it and then looked back at Roy. He gave me an almost amused, almost worried look. Almost… sad. We stood at the same time. He flicked his cigarette bud out in to the yard and followed after me in to the kitchen. Damn it was this fucker persistent or what? I went to the fridge and he sat at the table. I decide a nice glass of juice and a pop-tart would do the trick. I wasn't as nervous as before to eat in front of him, but it was still weird to ingest food in front of someone so superior to you. You feel like you slip up and do one thing wrong and you might as well have your ass cooked and served to everyone there at the moment of your mishap. It's just that he's got so much on me I have kept a secret from Granny and Winry and if he didn't mind I would love to keep it that way. I sat down on the other side of the table and proceeded to eat. He just stared at me. I nibbled on the edge of my pop-tart and blamed his look on sleep deprivation. He got up and went to the fridge himself, pouring a tall glass of milk and setting the jug back in before again, taking a place at the table. I winced as he took a sip and sat it back down.

"You don't have to drink it, so don't make that face." He said in a lightly irritated tone. I looked away. I was sure he hadn't saw my small childish display. I glanced back up at him biting my lip and sat down my pop-tart I was still holding. Suddenly, I wasn't so hungry anymore. He curtly looked down at me and then went back to his milk. I think no sleep was starting to get to me as well. My smart remarks usually just roll off my tongue, but tonight it was like I was a different person. It felt wrong. I could feel myself furrowing my eyebrows in thought. I moved to get up.

"Aren't you gonna' eat?" He asked quizzically. I just shook my head 'no'.

"Oh come on Fullmetal, we both know if you said you weren't hungry that it would be a lie." He followed me up the stairs, the rest of my pop-tart in his hand, and in to the bedroom where he proceeded to give me a whole lecture about not eating properly.

"FINE! I'll eat the damn pop-tart mother!" I tried to slap the mother part on as thickly as possible, but he only gave me a small smile and curled back up in to his bed still blabbering on and on. After that, I just laid down on the recently occupied mattress and blocked him out as best I could. All I can remember were his words slurring together and then they just seemed to fade out and in to the distance.

**I will love you dearly if you review, but seeing how most don't know how or don't get the concept they should do it out of curtisy here's how it's done-**

**Step 1) click the review button.**

**Step 2) Tell me what you think.**

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**Step 4) Go do whatever you want because after that I'm not holding you down. :D**

**Also, I'm not gonna' even think about putting out a new chapter until I get some reviews! I want what I want and I'm only human. So GO! XD**

**Ed: BYE! :D**

**Me: BYE! :D**

**Roy: Can't wait for the next chapter!**

**Me: Roy say Bye... *says in a whisper***

**Roy: Oh yeah... BYE! :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**This is the second chapter, enjoy, but I have to warn you, there is a depressing setting to this and if you're looking for a gentler story you need to pack up your things and start looking elsewhere. Thanks for your time.**

**Roy: How rude. T.T**

**Ed: I agree… **

**Me: Just go with it. :D**

**Enjoy!**

Morning. It is morning, again. Morning is a repeated recurrence of the solar planet, known as the sun, after midnight has gone and mid-day has yet to begun. Damn, I sound like a dictionary. I stretch and roll over. I've still got four more days of this hell. I rest a little while longer. I'm totally lost in what to do. This, right now, is the only day off I've had in God knows how long. I roll over again to find a better position. I feel weird. I feel like I'm being watched. I know I'm alone so why do I feel this way. I don't want to open my eyes because I know what I'll see. I don't want to open them to sunshine. I want it to rain, just for a little while. I want to run and play in it like I did when I was a child. I want to feel the crisp chill of the air slap against my face as I glide away from the thunder. I want to look up in to the sky and see gray clashing with a dash of neon yellow. I want to wonder and not know the answer. I want to marvel at the sun's rays trying to break free through the hazy clouds. I want the sun to struggle for the sky. What am I saying? I don't want to get up because of them. Alphonse and Winry, the perfect couple. I'm only blinded by my jealousy. I can't stop myself. I hate that part of me. I want that. I want the feeling of being touched, needed… loved. I want to fall head over heels in love with someone and find myself diving in to their arms like I belonged there all along. I bet Mom would be proud. How could I fess up to being gay? If my parents do look down at me from where they are, do they know? Ha. I laugh at myself because I know no one cares. I always worry about people finding out. I'm afraid my friends and family won't accept me. What would happen if they didn't? I push those thoughts away. They can wait for another time. It's not like I know anyone gay anyway. I feel like I've lain here for hours. I decide to flip on my stomach. I bring one knee up beside my rib cage and clutch my pillow to my face. I can't shake that nervous feeling I had last night. It's come back with a vengeance. I decide to take some deep breaths. I bring my knee up closer and draw it under my torso. By now, I bet my ass is sticking up in the air. I don't care. It's not like anyone else is going to see. I push the covers away and rub my face against my pillow; it's so comforting to do that. I take my flesh hand and run it along through my hair, down to my neck, and up to my cheek in an attempt to rid the soreness from my body. I tried to massage my shoulders a little bit and I let out a soft moan. When's the last time I got a massage? Mom used to do it for me when I had leg cramps. I was really young then. My hand found its way up to my eyes; fingers pinching the bridge of my nose and rubbing each side to relieve the headache I was starting to get. I rolled my head around on my neck and felt the soft pops. I arched my back and moved around this way and that cracking every joint everywhere, even going as far as popping my fingers and toes. A moan accompanying the near-quiet snaps as soon as they were made. I opened my eyes and looked to the door. Thank goodness, it was closed. I stood up, facing it, and leaned down the touch the ground. It wasn't enough, so I reached farther and placed my fingers under the soles of my feet. I leant back upwards and stretched out to the sky. I still had a kink in my pelvic bone… I'll have to fix that. My socks slid across the floor in opposite directions. I slowly made my descent to the hardwood paneling and landed in the splits. It took me a minute to twist and turn so that I could feel my hips pop and then my pelvis. It felt so much better.

"I didn't know you were a cheerleader." I gasp and looked behind me to find Roy sitting in the straight back chair next to the window. Oh shit! I sprang up from the floor as fast as I possibly could. I forgot he was here. How could I forget? He's the sorry ass who drug me out here in the first place. How much is he going to find out about me before we leave? I just sat back down on my bed and pulled my knees up to my chest. I think this is starting to become a defensive position for me.

"I didn't know you were a stalker." My melancholy voice broke free from my throat.

"You know, all that popping kind of looked like it hurt. Just knowing you're that flexible puts me in pain." I sighed and turned up my chin in his direction.

"I feel better after I do it." This isn't as awkward as I thought it would be. It's more like casual conversation. I can't pull my eyes away from his. Our talking has ceased. It's a calm silence. For a moment I can't remember how to look away. His deep, dark eyes are looking right through me. My heart starts to pound.

"Edward? Are you okay?" I take a deep breath like I had just been drowned and look away.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I can see him out of the corner of my eye. He's still staring.

"You can tell me anything. I hope you know I'd like to think of you as a friend, Edward." My heart beat is running a frantic race. I can feel the blush powdering my face. I want to be that, too. Oddly, I feel like I want a little more. May be close friends, may be pinky swear pals. I don't think Roy would ever think about allowing me that close. Honestly, I didn't think he even cared about his relationship with me. I am an under-ranking officer. May be that doesn't matter. I want to get to know him better. All I know about him is… scratch that. I don't know anything about him. Other than his physical appearance and his smart ass demeanor, I know absolutely nothing about this man.

"I'd like that, too." A small smile jumped to his face. Honestly, if you hadn't been looking, then you wouldn't have seen it. I scooted off of my bed and went to the bathroom taking along a pair of shorts and a T-shirt. I brushed my teeth, brushed my hair, and swiftly put it back in to a bun on the crown of my head. I went back to the room finding Roy. He had been dressed all along in casual wear.

"Wow." He seemed astonished as I walked in.

"What?" He had no right to gawk at me that way.

"Well, it's just… all I've ever seen you wear is like tight, leathery, black clothes." Those words sort of punched me in the face. It kind of stung a little. Don't get me wrong – I love the leather look and I'm a freak for black, but I like going back to my childhood every once in a while. Putting on clothes that reminded me of the past, it's nice.

"I just want to wear these today." I found myself saying this and it was the truth, but I could have gone in to more detail. Knowing what I feel and then saying that makes it seem like I'm lying.

"What are going to be up to today Edward?" He asked me. I thought about it a minute. Wait, why does he want to know?

"Well, I was thinking about lying around the house or running around outside." He nodded at my statement.

"Do you mind if I accompany you?" He seemed rather eager.

"Sure, but I'm going to go now. Are you coming?" He slowly got up.

"Yeah." He walked towards me slowly and I lead the way down the stairs. When we made it to the bottom I turned to him.

"Don't say a word or make a sound, otherwise we'll never get of this house." He nodded and I proceeded quietly. We were almost there. I was about to open door when Alphonse sprang out of nowhere.

"Hey Edward! Where are you going?" I could feel my anger rising! Damn it! Every time I try to get out of this house someone's always blocking my path.

"Nowhere." I state still reaching for the door. I feel him grab my shoulder.

"Good because Winry would like to see your automail. She says she wants to evaluate it just in case it needs some work done." I sigh.

"Alphonse," I start off in a whiny voice, "I don't want to! Winry knows I haven't grown for years and all I've been doing is paper work since everything happened." He gave me a glare and hooked a thumb in the direction of Winry's room.

"Then tell that to her and by the way, she's pregnant." My eye twitched. A pregnant Winry… damn. I quickly grabbed for the door handle and flung it open only to be grabbed up by Alphonse, who stood at least a foot taller than me by now. I fought him, though. I was not going to give in that easily.

"Let me go Al! I do NOT want to do it right now! I was going to run! I can't run if I have that fake leg on me! Stop! Put me down! No!" I was throwing the fit of a lifetime. Alphonse didn't even flinch as I let out a blood curdling scream. I could see Roy walking behind us giving me a sympathetic look.

"Winry don't make me do this right now!" She was standing in the hallway. Dark venomous rays of anger were rolling off her body in a strong vibe.

"It'll only take a minute Ed. Jesus, you make it seem like we're about to kill you." She had her wrench in hand. Now, I'll admit, I'm scared. Alphonse plopped me down on the patient's bed and Winry went to work taking measurements. When she was finished she looked down at me with a weird expression.

"You really haven't grown at all. Wow. I mean that's just… the weirdest thing ever. It's just that you're dad was so tall and your mother was average, but you, you have came to a complete halt in your growth. Two years and nothing happened. Not even you're weight has changed." She shook her head in disbelief and flung her hands up in a defensive position.

"Okay Ed, you can go." She turned around still looking slightly creeped out. I pouted.

"I'm not short Winry." I pushed my way to the edge of the bed heaving my legs over the side. Then I slid off to touch the floor again. The height difference from my feet to the floor almost mocked me as Alphonse and Roy looked on. I really wasn't that short, was I? I walked to the front door again and pushed it open.

"Aren't you gonna' put on some shoes?" I gasp in surprise. I hadn't expected him to come with me after that. I am pretty childish when it comes to my automail.

"No. When I run, I don't wear shoes." He threw a casual 'ok' at me and we were out the door. I walked to the dirt road and stood in the grassy ditch beside it. There was no town for miles. It was just plot after plot of open land. And I began. At first I took it slow. Then, I kicked it up and ran like it was a race. I want it. I want that high. I want that ultimate feeling. I want to feel the rush of endorphins smothering me. I was getting there. Faster, faster. I was mocking myself. I will make it. I can feel it coming. My heavy breathing slowed, I could feel my heart pounding less and less, my limbs no longer felt heavy. I ran faster. It was a kick of energy. That burst of drugs that you didn't have to inhale. That floating feeling. Soon after, it was gone. I ran until I couldn't anymore, finding myself flopping down in a green field. The tall grass swayed back and forth in the gentle breeze covering my whole body. I closed my eyes as I felt a thump beside me. Roy and I lay there panting and feeling our muscles throb from this strenuous activity.

"You're fast." He stated. His breath had begun to slow. I began to giggle, but I stopped myself. I don't want him to think I'm girly. I flipped on to my stomach and groaned.

"What's wrong?" He sat up a little concerned. I looked up at him.

"Nothing, it's just I'm so sore all over." I put my face in my arms and closed my eyes once again. I want to fall asleep and forget about this pain. I could feel sleep coming to me. I was weaving in and out of consciousness when I felt a hand on my back. I jumped up and grabbed it out of defense. It was a reflex really. Roy looked at me and then down to his hand. I let go.

"What- what was that?" I asked him and he just shrugged.

"I just thought you might like a rub down." He then scrunched his eyebrows together as if to say 'but if you don't want to…' I shook my head.

"No. It's okay if you want to do it." I lay back down in the same position.

"So, if it was someone else then you wouldn't let them?" He asked in a mocking tone. I sighed.

"Shut up." I let those words out because it was true. I trusted him, sort of. It's hard to explain the way I feel about him. I felt him grab at one of my shoulders and then the other. His fingers diving in to every little cranny they could find. They dug in to my muscles and wove over my bones. It was nice. They soon met my lower back. He used his palms to rub out the unwelcome achiness. It all felt wonderful. He was so close to me, touching me this way. His hands traveled a little farther south. He was just to the top of my ass and then his fingers dove around to find my hip bones. He worked on those; he traveled a little more inward. Now his hands were on the part of my leg that connects to my ass. I want him to touch me there more. That place turns me on. I want him to kiss me there. I hear myself let out a moan. What am I thinking? I cannot believe I just did that. His hands stopped, but didn't leave my body. Oh no. I've just ruined any chance of a friendship between us. How could I? I don't have anyone left and just when I thought that was about to change… I have to screw it all up. I defensively rolled on to my side and stared at him for a moment.

"Forgive me." I dashed out of my grassy abode, out of the meadow… out of that relationship. Yes, Roy, please forgive me. I run and run all the way back to my house. I wouldn't go back to where he could find me, for now. I sat in front of the ruble and ash that was left from my hefty experiment. I bowed down to it as if to say my apologies. How dare I insist that we burn it down? This house was the only happy memory that I had left. Everything that my mother had worked so hard to keep alive while she was here was destroyed by one of her only sons. I'm a monster. I ask myself – how dare I? How dare I? I'm a fool for dragging my remaining family in to a hell on earth for years. This is why I hate this place. This is why I refuse to come here until I must. It's painful and it makes me feel sorry for everyone I've ever hurt because it's all rooted from this place. No, it all came from me. I originated from this place. My knees land in the soft dirt, my face falls in the palms of my hands. I want to die. I want to die a horrible death by the hand of someone I have betrayed. I want to feel afraid because the afterlife does not haunt me. I have tasted it too many times to become a virgin to its meaning. I feel it begin to rain. It picks up until I'm soaked, but I stay there. Like a piece glued to a mantel, I remain. I feel a hand thrust on to my back, but I only feel the need to cry out a curse to this land. I do not turn to that appendage. I do not want to be pitied by that persons face. They flip me around and I do not fight. I have lost my will. I don't open my eyes I only fall in to their willing arms. I cry and hold on for anything, for some meaning to my feelings.

"Why! WHY!" I scream out to the person as they lift me up in to their arms. I hiccup in to their shoulder and sob a little more. I haven't cried in such a long time, I don't want to let them go. I know who you are. I don't want you, but how can I say no when I obviously need it? I need you, Roy mustang.

**That's the end for now! I can't wait to see some reviews. Until next time – have a good read! :D**

**Ed: Pathetic.**

**Me: I know. T^T**

**Roy: Wow. Just… wow.**

**BYE! :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello! This is my third chapter! I hope you all enjoy it as much as I enjoyed getting it done.**

**Roy: Gosh, just read it already.**

**Edward: What's with that attitude you got going there?**

**Me: Hey! There will be no rude comments made about attitude-y-ness.**

**Edward: That is not even a word.**

**Me: Yes, it is... I just made it up! And there will be no discussion about it! TeeHee :D**

His heartbeat… it thrummed against my eardrum. The rain slapped against my back. He ran on. His steps steady, but frantic at the same time. It felt wrong. All of this felt like a dream. After a while of the rain, I became numb. I'm too give out from running and dealing with stress. I want to go home. Yet, he carried me onward. I'm straddling his waist like a small child. It feels right to be this way. His breathing has picked up. I looked down at the dirt road behind us. Puddles are everywhere. I can't tell if we're near or far from our destination. I close my eyes and listen to him breathe. The thought that I can make him breathe this way crosses my mind. How could I be thinking about something so stupid at a time like this? He's carrying me because I'm too much of a baby to get up and run myself. I hope he doesn't think that about me. He slows down and runs off to the side. Where are we going? I feel him pushing on something with his left arm and it rolls away. Then we are inside. I open my eyes to pitch blackness. He sits down with me still clinging to him. I shiver and he holds me closer. I am so cold.

"Edward… Ed?" I sit up a little to look at him, but all I see is the outline of his jaw. He draws up his knees behind me and I sink down on his chest. I feel so lazy, so fatigued. He just holds me.

"Where are we?" My voice comes out weak almost strained. I don't want to talk anymore.

"Some kind of barn." I don't care where we are. Really, I just want to know when we get to go home.

"Why?" I think that's the only thing my brain can process at the moment.

"Because the rain was coming down so hard I couldn't see, so, I guess we're stuck here until it lets up." He sounds weird. He's still breathing heavy from running. My nose feels itchy. I think I'm about to… I'm gonna'. I just sneezed.

"You are going to catch a cold." He clung to me tighter.

"No I'm not." I said back, but I didn't fight him. He was warmer than me. I pushed my cheek to his chest closer. I want to hear his heart beat again. It's so steady and loud.

"Edward… you shouldn't have run off like that." His voice held concern. I didn't say anything. A few minutes passed.

"You scared me. I couldn't find you when I went back to the house. I was running all over the place trying to make sure you were okay. Then, it started to rain. I went to run the road again looking for you and you weren't there. I was getting more scared. Then, I went to the place your house used to sit and there you were." I felt his grip tighten a little more on me. He leant his head forward to lay it on my shoulder. I swallowed hard. He didn't say anything. I guess he assumed I had fallen asleep. That's okay, I was almost there anyway. I felt myself slip in to a daydream. Slowly, I gave in to the darkness.

_Here, I was at the train station. I was so young. Alphonse stood beside me. He was a little bit taller than me, but I didn't care. The train is coming down the tracks. It's so close to us, I can smell the bitter smoke as it rolls off the stack in waves. It's hot, about one-hundred and one degrees Fahrenheit. Alphonse is complaining softly about the weather and I just stand there melting like ice-cream left out in the sun. The train keeps rolling towards us. It was almost to us, when someone pushed me off the platform and down on to the tracks. I try to stand up and run away, but my leg is caught under something. I look back, but no one even knows I'm down here. They can't hear me over the train's roar as it chugs on. I scan the crowd to find my culprit, maybe it was an accident, but at least they'd know I was down here, right? I see a man in a dark trench coat with the collar flipped up and a hat pushed down over his face. He's looking at me. I can tell. The train is closer, too close. I'm crying now. I reach out to that person and scream. The air is whooshing past him and his hat flies away. I stop myself for a moment. A menacing smile creeps across his face as he gives me a sarcastic wave and then shoves his hand down in to his pocket disappearing in to the crowd. I look up just as I'm smeared across the tracks. I black out. Who is the mysterious man who pushed me, you may ask. Why, it's none other than Roy Mustang._

I jolt up from my sleep. Where am I? This doesn't look like a barn to me. I look around to find that I'm in my bed. I lay back down on my side. The other bed is made. I sigh out loud; at least he's not here right now. I roll over a little to see there is someone in my bed. I fling myself backwards, landing on my butt, on the floor, and let out one of the most paint curling screams I have ever made. He jumps up.

"What the hell?" He screams. I feel my heartbeat speed up as I begin to breathe heavily from the sudden scare.

"You nearly gave me a heart attack!" He just looks at me and then smiles. I sit there pouting for a moment, but before long I give in and smile back. He leans over the side of the bed and pulls me upward and in to his arms. We lay back down. We snuggle up and he puts his arms around me. What the fuck?

"What are we doing?" I whisper looking up at him. He smiles and rests his forehead against mine.

"Whatever we feel like." He yawns and so do I. It feels good to be lazy a bit. His arms around the small of my back. Our stomachs' are pushed together. I feel happy this way. I feel okay with him holding me, but why? It's okay to stay this way if he wants to and I want to.

"Okay." I scoot down to put my head on his chest. Even way down here, my feet don't touch his. I thumb his huge muscles. Then, I realize my automail is probably really cold. I withdraw it and let it hang off to my side. He looks down and grabs it. I don't say anything, I don't have the nerve today.

"You know, I like you… all of you." His voice is like velvet. I grin and blush a little. It kind of feels nice to be liked. He swings us around so that I'm on top of him now. My chin is lying in my palms as I smile up at him.

"There. Now I have a better view." He plays with my long golden hair and brings it up to his face to kiss it slowly. He's watching me as he does this. It's almost like an invitation. I stare at him for a moment. He is being so nice to me lately. Why? He has all the girls hanging off his arm when he's in central. He tells everyone he's just playing the field, trying to find someone to have a good time with. He's the one night stand guy. That kind of jerk that pulls at their heart strings and then just stops seeing them. Or at least, that's what I've heard. I don't want to end up being the person who gets hurt. Is he just lonely? I don't want to be his midday whore. If we're going to do this then it has to be real.

"You're not gay, Roy." I lay my chin down on to his peck. He stares at me a moment.

"I'm not a slut, Roy." I say again, but a little more forcefully.

"I know you're not a slut." He reaches down to thumb my cheek. His finger tips are soft, but that's explainable; he wears gloves all day… everyday.

"Am I going to be an experiment of some sort to you?" I ask being quite cheeky. He looks a little shocked.

"No, I have a ranging sexuality Edward." He props his head up on some pillows and yanks me upward toward his face.

"And I'm not a ragdoll!" I probably look irritated, but I'm not.

"I want to get to know you better. You intrigue me." He kisses my forehead, neck, cheek, lips. I stop him.

"Then ask me what you want to know and I'll tell you. It's not like I know anything about you either." He smirks at me, reaches for a pack of cigarettes, and lights one up.

"Well, I'd like to know you're full name." I give him a stupid look.

"You know my name." He rolls his eyes.

"You're middle name is what I'm talking about." I just smirk and chuckle a little.

"You've never looked through my records to get it," he tries to but in, but I cut him off, "fine, fine, I'll tell you. It's Edward Jake Elric." He leaned downward to give me a quick kiss on the lips.

"Thank you. Now I can give you a proper nick name. I think it might be-"

"Okay, stop right there. Anyway, I want to know your real name, too." Roy looked nervous. He sucked down half of his fag in one go. Now, he's acting weird.

"I don't want to tell you. It's embarrassing." He was excessively serious now.

"Oh come on, I'm an adult. I think I can handle an embarrassing name or two." He still looked skeptical.

"Well, okay, but you better not laugh or tell anyone… it's Umm. It's… Cherry." He looked a bit sheepish.

"You mean, like the fruit," he nodded, "Wow. Just, wow." I sniggered a little. I really don't want to offend him or anything, but Cherry? One of the worst possible names to give a woman, much less a man!

"So, what is your favorite dessert?" He asked unknowingly.

"I think chocolate pudding and tapioca pudding are my favorites." He looked surprised by my confession.

"Really? I thought that you probably wouldn't even eat dessert." I crossed my arms and laid my head over in them.

"Yes, I eat just like everyone else. So, what's your favorite?" He thought about it for a moment bringing his fingers up to his chin. They rubbed against his smooth jaw line.

"My favorite dessert? Hmm. I think it will have to be… chocolate-mint ice cream." He finished his sentence with a definite nod of approval at his choice.

"I like that, too." Roy thought for a moment on what to ask next.

"Okay, how tall are you and before you even ask, I'm five foot eight." He looked a little too smug.

"Well, this is embarrassing… I'm four foot eleven." I finished proudly or at least I tried to. It came out with a blush. I can already feel it creeping up to my cheeks.

"Aw, you're so cute." I smiled and tried to hide my increasing redness.

"Shut up." I said teasingly. I was actually okay with him poking fun at my height. I felt so, well, cute with him. I feel adorable. I giggled quietly. His low chuckle rang throughout the room. Then there was a knock at the door. They jiggled the door handle.

"Edward? Are you okay? You've been in there all day. Is Roy in there with you?" Thankfully the door was locked thanks to my new…. uh… boyfriend? Lover? Whatever he's supposed to be to me.

"I'm fine and yes, he's here. Thanks for checking on me Al." I heard him step away from the door.

"Okay, if you need anything you know where to find me." I listen to his footsteps descend down the stairs to the first floor. He was gone and we were alone. Roy pushed back some of my hair and turned his head to let off a puff of smoke.

"So… Oh, I've got one! What is your least favorite food?" I was the one to initiate the question. Roy sucked in his bottom lip for a moment, something I've never seen him do. It's wonderful to see all his little quirks.

"Well, my least favorite food is," he paused to think for a moment, "It has to be beef stew. God, I hate that stuff!" Really, Beef stew is one of my favorites. That makes me feel anxious, but in an excited way because now I have a good reason to tell him that.

"How can you hate it? I love it. It's amazing the way Granny makes it. She is such a good cook! She puts milk in it and you can't even taste it! I mean, that's got to take some skill." He threw the back of his head against the pillow behind him and laughed out loud at the apparent irony.

"You're so picky." His chuckling not finding an end as he wiped away a tear and finally quieted down at a glare from me.

"No, I am most definitely not." I ended on a frustrated note. He tilted my chin up to his forcefully and begged for an entrance of any kind, which I bluntly turned down with a small swift bite to his lower lip.

"Ow, What was that for?" He drew away unwillingly with a puppy dog pout.

"You keep pushing me around and doing things that I'm not certain I even want to do. Now, let's finish our little game of twenty questions or 'us' will remain me, as in myself alone, and you, as in yourself alone." He quirked an eyebrow at me and I gave him his expression right back. I felt really immature and I hope he did too or he was exactly what I've been keen on calling him for years – an idiotic bastard.

"Okay, fine… geez, you really tried to take a chunk out of my lip didn't you?" He pulled it out with his index finger and thumb, and looked down as if he could see the cut.

"Yes, I did, didn't I?" I got closer and pushed his hands away as I tucked my tongue down onto his bleeding lip. It was wet, metallic, and warm tasting… I guess that's what I'm supposed to feel. I've only made out with a couple people before in my life and that was a long time ago when I had begun to get curious during my teenage years. I pulled away and was pleased to hear his grunt of disapproval.

"I have a good question," He gave me an 'hmm' in response, "do you want something to eat?"

"I was hoping you'd ask sooner or later because I'm starving." I rolled out of bed and stretched. Somehow, I had made it into an overly huge button down shirt and a pair of tight boxers. I knew the boxers were mine because I'm the only one in this house that wears children's underwear.

"Who does this shirt belong to?" I asked pushing the sleeves up my arms.

"Mine. I couldn't find any of your bed wears so I just put one of my shirts on you." He smirked. I turned to the door and shrugged off his perverseness. I opened up the callused wood plank and walked down to the kitchen with him on my heel.

"Granny? Are you here?" I looked down the hall as Winry poked her head out.

"No, she went down to the little rock store with Alphonse to get some groceries." I waved in her direction and she waved back as I ran and practically dove in to her lap.

"What are you doing?" I asked rather childishly because I knew it would get on her nerves.

"I'm not working right now if that's what you're wondering." I rolled over in her lap to face her stomach.

"Are you really pregnant or was Alphonse just saying that to scare the crap out of me?" She giggled and took both of my hands to place them on her lower belly. I could feel that it was slightly swollen.

"Yes I am and you're gonna' be an uncle!" She fisted the air in a hooray like motion and laughed out loud as she threw me off of her and onto the floor. Her small foot came down on me with a thud.

"What is this under my feet, huh? Is it an anorexic door mat? Oh, I'm sorry, I was sure you were a door mat, but now I know you're too small to be a mat, you have to be some kind of dust rag." I laughed as she tackled me down again and started a tickle war.

"Stop it! Ha-ha!" I couldn't get her off.

"You can't take it, can you?" She asked with a goofy laugh.

"No! I can't take it!" She laughed louder and rolled over so that we we're both flat on the floor. I looked at her and she smiled at me.

"So, what have you and my brother decided to name it?" I asked after we had settled down a bit.

"Well, if it's a girl I wanted to name her Madeline, but Alphonse doesn't know what he wants yet, so I've just been calling our baby, well, Baby." She flipped on to her side towards me and put her hands on her lower stomach to feel around. After a while, she closed her eyes and smiled.

"You know, I've only been pregnant for four months and I'm already ready for it to get here. I want to see her or him so badly. It's like a person I've known for so long, but I haven't known them at all." She stopped and opened her eyes.

"Have you ever had that feeling?" She looked so eager to know.

"Yeah, I've gotten that feeling before." I have most definitely gotten that sensational rush. It's like someone decided to play a cute trick on you. The feeling that you've met someone you've never knew- that should be a saying. My mind wondered to the man that I left in the kitchen. It's almost like he's been standing in the shadows all this time and has only came when the light was cast his way. He was always there for me and Alphonse, even though he is a bastard sometimes, and now he's there for me on a whole new level of trust. That is, may be, if I let him.

**Hey, you guys! So how do you think I did? Good, bad... I don't know... uhhh... stupid? I don't care - jut tell me what you think! :D**

**Roy: Whew... I no longer have attitude-y-ness.**

**Edward: That's good.**

**Me: REVIEWS! :D**


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